They know not what they are have done. Yes, the rumours are true. For seven days in November, the debauched collective that is Broken Toyz will invade the placcid communist environs of Macau, China. That noise you hear will not be the roar of engines from the Macau Grand Prix, but the screams of an entire nation of repressed female libidos as they experience, for the first time in the Far East, the wonder of sexual (ok, and musical) power that is Broken Toyz.
How will the pristine vaginas of the Orient ever recover once they've been plundered by the likes of Dannii Lee Damage ( and his Sarah Palin-tainted equipment). I've heard tell of Johnny Emaxx exhausting a dozen ****** year-old girls in an Indonesian brothel, leading me to believe he may single-handedly despoil half of the female population of Macau. Tommy Gunns' prediliction for the certain bodily fluids of Asian women has already been documented in these 'pages', and Likki Stixx, as we all know, only requires 'two t**s, a h**e and a heartbeat' to set his mojo in motion.
Of course, we musn't forget the raw power of the Toyz and their unparalleled live show. They will cut a wide swath through the festivities during this world-class event, leaving a world-class hangover in the skulls of their soon-to-be Macanese fans.
If you have the resources, I highly recommend that you try to tag along with the Toyz as they do their best to corrupt the moral fibre of our 'friends' across the Pacific.
Zai jian,
Eli Finkelstein (Cy's kid)
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