I think I'm ok now...

So, I was a little wound up yesterday. Tuesday's election had taken me out of my element a bit. I've never been so giddy about anything, except maybe having my way with leftover Toyz groupies in a room full of free beer and a bowl of condoms (they're great for making balloon animals, chicks dig that...really!). So my twitchy, agitated high energy state was unusual. Thankfully, Tommy Gunns was there for me. He helped me find my centre. And it was so simple.

Gunns is a spiritual man, in touch with his inner peace. He saw me pacing, chattering, trying to unwind from my democracy high. He told me he had just the way for me to relax. He got me to sit...what was that? Sorry. He got me to sit down and breath deeply. I took a couple of...did you see that? Uh, where was I? Oh yeah, I got my breathing under control while he made me some kind of hot beverage. As I sipped...holy shit, did you see the size of that goddamned beetle? Lecu sisec neteti oresug lagot lefet nid sicor de: Nonama seserus te tom lud tile tosu ner hiesaru. I started to really let go. An invisible hand of relaxation moved from my toes to my fiery, Satan-caressed calves, up my blood-soaked thighs and cupped my musky, sweating temie tiece icedos ner samo yeruge ocosasol otop anene ta. Sadly, I don't even remember when the naked angel with the huge dripping erafor tag tu lo. Owilek arekeco otet nehin.

Use amele yareseg ete niedif pefo nahame to tiet. I felt a litle uneasy for a moment, but then acukida mera ietopa litococ apucatil bulasi; gaparan vilehen titirol sor. But, really, I was glad that my dead Grandmother had come to pay us a visit. She'd stabbed Tommy in the head with a fountain pen, but he didn't seem to Ci kat tayeles kal arobi puyi nelal ga lasecet dahibu. Cesure iped mosilo ise.

And, as you can tell, it all did the trick. I feel like a million bucks today. My head has never felt clearer. That Gunns, he sure knows what it takes to keep a guy on the straight and narrow, focused on the important things. He's been a Godsend this week.

Riroyor ledop...

Finkel Elistein (Spawn of Satan)