Step right up

I love walking around at Stampede don't you? There's nothing like dropping $40 bucks to win a stuffed banana with arms, worth 32 cents. Or watching morbidly obese children jam their faces full of a ball of cotton candy 3 feet in diameter that contains 4976 calories. It warms my heart. And how often, when you're not at the T&C, do you get to see freaks like the bearded lady? It's just non-stop fun, everywhere you look.

That reminds me of a story...

One cold winter night, the band was playing in Chicago. I think they were playing with Enuff Z'nuff , but I could be mistaken. Anyway it was a not-so-well attended show, and the band was a bit down. Johnny, being Johnny, figured the only way to salvage the night was to get some action and warm up this lacklustre night. He stumbled out of the dressing room and back out into the club. There were exactly two chicks in the whole room. Johnny figured what the hell...he ended up back at one of the chicks places, but with both chicks. Things are looking up, he thought. As he was messing around with one chick, the other mysteriously disappeared. As things started looking up (If you know what I mean) Johnny, felt a cold sensation on his unit and he looked down to see it immersed in a bucket of plast...


What? That happened to Gene Simmons, too? And to Jim Morrison? And to Jimi Hendrix? They all had plaster casts made of their units? Wow, that's a coincidence...

Uh...ok...Tommy just told me that it happened to Gene and Jim and Jimi, but not Johnny. Tommy was lying to me when he told me it happened to Johnny. Bastards...they're always f***ing with me.

Anyway, the guys have done and seen it all, except getting their packages casted for posterity. That happened to a bunch of guys just not Johnny. But he's cool anyway.

Ok. I gotta go now. But I'll be back with more shit you didn't know about Broken Toyz!

Later,
Eli Finkelstein (Cy's kid)